The Simple Complex Life

Life relates much to that of this picture above. Such simplicity to look at, but an underlying, intriguing complexity behind each reflection, each wave or distraction, and each minute that goes by...

I find myself running into the same question from time to time. Throughout life we all must go through our own tribulations, our own struggles, and our own challenges. But once those challenges are overcome do they really go away or are they masqueraded behind new challenges and troubles? When one storm passes, doesn't another one follow along soon after? I guess my question to the world is does time really heal us or does life just offer better distractions in the mean while? When pondering this question many things come to the surface. For instance; how does anyone truly heal from a broken heart, a lost loved one, or even failure? Are we truly going through a process of healing our hearts, our minds, and our souls, or do we merely run into bigger distractions that help take our focus off that certain healing process? This then poses another question. Why do people always find the need to say cliche statements like; "Only time will tell" or "Give it time?" I find these declarations to be undeniably repetitive and they essentially have lost all meaning behind the actual words. It's as if they are used as a filler in conversations when their is a loss for words. When it comes down to it we all have our own opinions, but mine remains at the same stance it always will.

Time is a valuable part of our lives. It offers many opportunities for those to grow, to learn, to prosper, and even to "heal" in some circumstances. However; whether it is a hot summer day in the middle of July, or a frosted night in December those whom are subdued in a troublesome environment are not healing because of time. Healing is a much more in depth, complex process as opposed to the simplicity of a clock ticking. Healing encompasses forgiveness, acceptance, reconcile, restoration, and in some cases learning to forget the undesirable occurrences. As a clock strikes twelve the feeling someone endures is still there, it doesn't disappear with time. On the opposing end there are situations where we can easily forgive, and accept, but many never forget. This is pure evidence that we truly don't always and completely heal, of course depending on the situation. Yes, we can go day to day growing to exhibit a better attitude towards the engagement, but this better attitude is arising from distractions that encircle us rather than our insides genuinely healing. The time that is lingering on comes with distractions such as; a job, school, friends, family, etc. And these things encompass our lives in a way that we are somewhat forced to push the troubles out of our mindset.

The way to ultimately heal is to take the situation for what it is. Accept it, endure it, and fight it. That is where time does come into play. It takes time for an individual to sit down and accept the life they have been dealt, and even after accepting and enduring it many can't fight it. The circumstances are then much different and the problems actually begin to consume those individuals- Much like the loss of a loved one. How do you tell someone who lost their ten year old son in a car accident that "With time it'll get better." When in reality that's not the case at all. Moreover; sometimes the time that passes after a tribulation occurs does quite the opposite of healing. It can cause someone to subdue themselves at a level we ought to never reach. Therefore; Does time really heal? No it doesn't. Time is part of an in depth process that is sometimes washed away by life's distractions. The complexity is much more than words can begin to describe, but ultimately healing is a process we must all learn to deal within order to prosper in each of of our lives.

The Simple Complex Life is much more than what meets the eyes. You must take it as it comes to you and rather than washing away each sea shell,or each tribulation, grasp them. Take them for what they are, for the unique imperfections they bring to your life and learn from them. If you allow the waves of life to masquerade your problems time can never work in your favor. Time can never be the only part of your "Healing" process. Thus each sea shell of life comes with it's own wave, it's own distraction. We must be able to fight that wave in order to genuinely become part of the ocean, rather a part of ourselves as a whole. Accepting, forgiving, and forgetting are all just part of the life we live. Moreover; the time that it takes us to do those things is an intricate part of the healing process, but it isn't THE healing process.


xoxo
Perfectly Imperfect
Crystal Kimberly

Never Tell A Lie

Ear Candy, Intriguing, Adventurous, Dance Worthy, Feel Good, Unique. All these words encompass the music created by the band Never Tell A Lie. Chris Perez and Mike Winters entered into their new venture of NTAL in November of 2008 in hopes of doing much more than making a name for themselves. Talking to Chris you realize the amount of passion that goes into every note they play, every note they sing, and every word they write. Growing up in Maryland it wasn't the easiest to get their feet off the ground. Both have been in bands before, but have come to a point where they both finally feel right. Where they both feel like not only is the music flowing out in the right direction, but it is going to change the lives of many. Recently they debuted their new EP, "The Thought That Counts" with songs such as; So Your Parents Won't Know, Always & Forever, Run Away, I'm a Fan of Yours, and The Thought That Counts. These songs all reach a different side of the spectrum of the music realm. They pull in the acoustic ballad to the feel good dance songs. These songs attack topics such as love and making something out of yourself. With the unique sounds of auto tune ringing through your years you are guarenteed to have a good time while listening. Want to hear more? Go to their myspace page http://www.myspace.com/nevertellalierock where the EP will soon stream for all to hear. Spread the word, spread the love, and most importantly spread the music. Not only are they endeavoring into a new adventure, but there is so much more to come from these two guys- so watch out... As their song, The Thought That Counts states, "This could be the start of something that I'll never forget..."

http://twitter.com/NTALChris
http://www.myspace.com/nevertellalierock
:)

Hello Goodbye

There are those whom live in routine. Those who do the same thing every morning from the moment they wake up to the second they close their eyes at night. Yet, I am not one of those people. I like change. Actually, I love change. I love the idea of doing something different everyday. I love to think that one second I could be living in the suburbs of New York and in a matter of a few months I could be moved across the country to where ever I find necessary for the life I want. I love to keep life interesting. I love to live in the moment and I love to also plan for the future as well. At times I am content with the life I live now. Yet, at times I am so consumed in class or work that I forget to think about what actual living feels like. When you think about it, we tend to spend more time planning our lives rather than actually living them. Moreover; since Freshman year of high school I have planned where I would be in four years, eight years, fifteen years... What college I wanted to go to, what major I would enter into, with what dreams of the future I had? But while I went through high school and into college I hadn't been able to actually live the dreams my mind and heart craved. I have been waiting for eight years for the opportunities others are already living at this point in their lives. Sometimes I get so lost in my grades and in my financial situations that I forget to look at the bigger picture. I forget to stop time and enjoy life. I am so ready for what people call the "real world." Yes, it will be challenging, different, and a huge change. But who doesn't like change and who doesn't want to rise to a challenge. I'm sick of the 9-5 jobs and the classes that occupy my days. I am ready to graduate and do something with that measly piece of paper we call a diploma. Don't get me wrong I am proud of my hard work in all my years of education. A 3.8 GPA is not easily gotten, but I am also proud of what I know I can become in the future. I am more intrigued with my potential at this point in my life than with my past. As Amanda Seyfriend sings in Mamma Mia, "I have a dream, a song to sing. To help me cope with anything. If you see the wonder of a fairytale. You can take the future, even if you fail. I believe in angels, something good in everything I see. I believe in angels, when I know the time is right for me. I'll cross the stream, I have a dream...." I truly know, as of right now, what I want out of life. And that is to make a difference. I want people to know my name, but not for fame or money. I want them to see the abilities that I have and they could potentially have to change the world for the better. Whether that be in the words that they write, the movements they create, the statements they make, or the work they do everyday. Everyone has the potential to make a difference, and I think its imperative to show the world they can do so.
Below is a song / poem a friend of mine ( Kayla ) and I wrote together. It is aimed towards bringing out a feeling of wanting more. The need for change, and the need to make something more of yourself in a new place with new people. Ultimately it is how I find myself feeling more and more as the clock ticks. We both have grown up and experienced rare and irreplaceable things here in this small town. However; we are ready for something larger. Something this small town may not have to offer. We are ready to stop saying no to things we know deep down inside we want to do, but don't because of the underlying responsibility we hold as a student, a daughter, a sister, an employee, et cetera. The feeling we once got from the car surfing, flour fighting, roof jumping life we used to have is no longer the fire we feel inside. (Ofcourse if there was an offer on the table for any of the above we'd never turn it down...lol) We feel a small flame beginning to grow for a new adventure, a new life, a change. Moreover; our past will always be with us in our hearts, but our future is what we are focusing on now. Yes, we are both looking for a huge change, but not necessarily in ourselves as people. Kayla and I will always be the crazy, outgoing, loud yet quiet at times, spontaneous, up for anything gals we grew up to be, but we'd like to bring that spontaneity to a new place with new dreams. We both have a lot inside of us we are willing to let out and we are just looking for ways to do so. For instance; a clothing line. Yes, you read that right. We have begun the beginning stages of yet another way to express how we feel. So if you have any ideas shoot them our way:) [ More to come on that....]

So...Here it goes. Let me know what you think. Better yet, let me know how YOU feel, because that is what is most important. How do you feel about change, new places, new people, new ways, and new dreams? Just remember, change is okay. It can be good for your soul, you heart, you mind, your body, and ultimately your life.

Hello Goodbye

I'm a small town girl, always will be
In the ever glow of this vivacious city
It's still not enough, not enough to change me
But I believe in second glances
I'm not passing up chances

Goodbye small town sights
Hello big city lights
Here we come, here we come
Goodbye small town life
Hello warm L.A. nights

We've said too much to turn back now
I smiled when I saw your face in the crowd
Cause I'm drowning
In this towns everlasting dust
I'm ready to get out
For what once was love has now become full of utter lust

Goodbye small town tales
Hello big city adventures
Here we come, here we come

Strip me down to my bare essentials
Things will never be the same
Ready to break out and rise above all our potentials
Ready to take over this life we call a game

Goodbye small town yearbooks
Hello new city faces
Goodbye small town minutes
Hello sleepless L.A. places
Here we come, here we come

Ready to leave this small town and go....



Perfectly Imperfect
xoxo
<3Crystal Kimberly

Let Loose and Sing if you wanna sing. Regardless of what it sounds like:) Just be you.

What stimulates your heart? What do you have the most fun doing?!

I love to goof off and sing. It's where I can be me...haha check it::

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDAm699bGNw

"The Game"

Have you ever found yourself contemplating where, when, how, and why there was this thing called, "The Game" introduced to the world. Why we as humans, woman and men, have to endure such tribulations, such rules, and such restrictions in order to endeavor into the dating world. Fear subsides in your gut in hesitations of what to say or not to say. Questions lurk in you mind, afraid to think a certain thought, and even if you think you know what the other is thinking you usually end up second guessing yourself. Since when did passion towards another person become such a complicated matter. You would think, "Hey I really like him/her. I should tell them." But no way, for most that is not even an option. We hide in their shadows in fear of rejection or in fear of quite the counterpart of that-a sincere connection. Love is such a precious gift that we fight so hard for. Then when we have it sometimes it's easily forgotten. I find myself glaring at those who strive for perfection in their relationships, and inevitably they fall into a pit of unhappiness. What they don't realize is Love is more than the want of perfections. Because love is actually quite the opposite. We love those we love for their unique tendencies. I sometimes ponder to myself why those around me fight to determine the rules to dating, the right and wrongs of love, and ultimately endeavoring into each moment questioning what will happen next rather than enjoying the current point and time. Since when did, "liking" someone become "THE GAME?" It's as if people over analyze the depths of dating rather than taking the time to look at what is right and blatantly in front of them. It's as if people are so obsessed with finding their happy ending that they overlook the obvious signs staring them in the face.
Girls, think back to when you were little. We were taught that if a guy hits you and runs away, he automatically likes you. However, how does that makes sense? And it doesn't help that movies employ you into the same train of thoughts. We see the typical jerk of a guy getting all the girls while the good guy is left alone in a corner of friendship. We need to begin to learn how to read the signs around us in order to determine who really wants us and who obviously does not. We need to distinguish between a happy ending and a fairytale, because I'm sorry but life is not a book. It comes with imperfection, moments of vulnerability, rejection, and fight. And whose to say that our individual happy endings include a significant other? Why can't the happy ending end with success, moving on in life, picking up the puzzle pieces we call life and putting them all together to fulfill your dreams? Does every person really need to be in a relationship to be happy? We are shown the "perfect" life through movies, television, and magazines. But is that REALLY the "perfect" life? Rather are we conceptualizing and contemplating the stereotypical view of a happy and perfect life as to what the media shows us?
Through all the questionable, misread signals flowing back and forth between two human beings maybe the ultimate happy ending encompasses throwing out the rules of dating and making your own. Maybe "The Game" isn't really a game and it is something this world is striving for in fear of a real, sincere, deep connection with the opposite sex. I see too many of my friends unhappy in some regards to dating. Yet, if we took the time to create our own rules, our own thoughts, and our own hopes in relation to that spectrum of connections, we could quite simply avoid all confusion, all frustration, and find one to sincerely love and adore for who and what you are together. Personally I know from experience the ups and downs of dating, and I hate "The Game." But I have recently come to know that once all the hesitations and fears are left behind amazing things can and will happen. You just have to trust your heart and let go of what you THINK you should do, and just do what you know you should do....Love is a beautiful thing in our world and there are many different ways to encompass that utter, amazing feeling in your daily lives. Just take a risk and don't think for once. It'll happen how it's suppose to happen from there...


Think about it....

Perfectly Imperfect
Crystal Kimberly
xoxo

:)

The Ripple Effect of Love

Occasionally when the sun collides with water it creates it's ultimate counterpart. A duplicate in itself, the current tore everything in it's path away from it's original position. Steadily the water began to settle and what once was a simple destruction transformed into a beautiful masterpiece. I stood there glaring into the diminutive waves picturing what life would be like if I was water. The sense of simplicity and elegance. Yet the ultimate sense of intensity and complexity. One might describe this as the perfect imperfection. As I stared off into the water more in depth it seemed evident that I resembled the water more than I deemed possible. Ones life encompasses many tribulations and many sacrifices. Mine, at times, contained more than I could handle. Being here was the only place that I could be free. That I could be who I wanted to be. Just me, the water, and the sun. And ofcourse the occassional birds flying by, but they don't judge you as harshly as the world. Freedom is a right this country fought so hard for. So why is it so difficult for me to feel a sense of liberation around others? As I stood there losing myself in thoughts and wonders I realized something. I having been coming to this same spot for years, and each adventure into the thoughts creeping in my mind, there was always a sneaking connection to love in some form. In all the handful of moments that are experienced in life, love takes the cake in terms of the amount of time we endeavor into something. Whether your loving your family, your significant other, your best friend, your dreams, your life, or your fears your are taking time to LOVE something.
At times, I stare off into the ripples of the water and try to conceptualize how people can go off into the world and hit another human being, say they hate someone, disown their own son or daughter, ignore the many wars going on around this Earth, or even something as horrible as murdering someone. It's crazy to think how each person in this world is just as equal as the ripples in the nearest pond of water. If we just each took the time to do simple things such as; smiling at the person walking past us or opening the door for someone, we could change the world. A ripple effect, like the water that lays in front of my very eyes, would begin to take effect all across the world. Sometimes I just want to stamp the word LOVE on my forehead for all to see. Do I care what people say? No. Why? Because I want everyone to look at my forehead and think, wow she is right. Why do we waste our time with utter despise and saddness? Why do we waste the time we have in life when life is a short gift given to us? It's sad to think that we can't just put our differences aside and love each other for who we are. I think the best part of love is we love people for their imperfections, their uniqueness, their qualities, and their intuitive thoughts. Love isn't about presumptions or judgements. Love is about caring and showing you care. Love is about family and friends, love is about dreams and making them come true, love is about this world coming together to make a better place. Cliche, yes. True, yes. Happening, no.
Love is an extremely powerful emotion that at times is absolutely irresistable. When you love something you identify with it. So... why not spread the love all around for all to experience. For those whom are unable to love are those whom are lost. Those whom can not find love are those in the most need of love. Break down your walls and paint love all over the world. Take a risk, a chance, a step, and say I love you. Look at those whom mean the most to you in your life and remind them of it. Do the things you love in life now in order to avoid regret. And remmember time is of essence and we need to enjoy it and help others enjoy it. Something as simple as the current of a stream can relate to the world, and we must recognize the comparison and apply it. Don't be afraid to look into your reflection and be who YOU are. Love the person you were, are, and will become for that is what is most important in life. If you love yourself, it is that much easier to trust and love others.

I love you.
And I dare you to love me...

Perfectly Imperfect
Crystal Kimberly
xoxo

Beautiful Disaster

Right now the birds are chirping, its 4:06 a.m. and I can not sleep. This is what happens when I think and type::

Sometimes we walk through life with those looking over our shoulders. And sometimes we dread the time that passes and inevitably makes us older. Consequences come from every decision. Just as stiches with each and every incision. Living up to expectations, trying to be unique. Creating your own visions and avoiding the constant critique. Life contains no guarentees. For you can climb and just as fast fall. Everything comes with it's small fees. Trying to be at all beck and calls. A life can be a beautiful disaster. Making things happen just a little faster. The good and bad. Reminiscing on all in which you've had. At times delirious. Atempting to never take anything too serious. Loving what you love. And inventing moments never heard of. Speaking ones mind. A sincere effort to leave nothing behind. Making a mess and then sweeping it under the closest rug. For in love you obsess, because it's as addicting as the next drug. A heart once broke. Memories burnt into smoke. A heart now stronger than ever. Ready for it's very next endeavor. Beating in the echos across the room. No longer afraid behind a costume. Some things unsaid. Not knowing what is ahead. Quietly some assume. While others are stuck to consume.
Not listening to a word. For the eyes tell more. With each humming bird, a new adventure ready to explore. One things wrong. The next is right. Losing yourself in the song or the words in which you write. Things may seem to hit rock bottom. Breathless at times. Senses become numb. Attempting to build a wall in which your heart climbs. Stuck in one spot. Craving adventure. Making an impression, never to be forgot. Undoubtely your last venture.


xoxo
Crystal Kimberly
Perfectly Imperfect

New adventure??

So I am sitting here, literally getting lost in the music entering into my ear drums. Songs about living your dream, love, faith and hope, and even things such as; failure, heartache, and loss. Music really has a way to embed it's messages into your brain. Yet at the same time I have found that it can help you get through pretty much any tribulation that you have to endure. For the past year I have increasingly become more involved with the music realm. I have had these dreams in my head building for so long, and ultimately I can not hold back anymore. There is so much I want to do. Recently however; I have contemplated launching my own site to promote and help musicians and bands involved in any kind of music. I also was thinking about promoting clothing lines, other companies, films (which I am working on currently) and basically anything. I have a huge passion for music, fashion, writing, singing, film, et cetera, and would love more than anything to help those in the business. I enjoy so much to see others prosperous, and the passion I have for this world is unreal. I have never felt so free, so driven, so hopeful, and so determined to make something work. Hopefully from this experience I can grow, I can start my own line of jewelery or clothes, I can start my own music venture, or my own writing career. These things will always be embedded and cherished in my heart. So I figured...Why not help those already doing so...??? So there you go...There is so much to come from me, Crystal Kimberly. I hope to build a secure foundation and see where it goes from there. So tell all your friends...Tell everyone you know...Because we all know the most significant way of advertising is word of mouth.

You will be hearing from me soon....

Much love,

Perfectly Imperfect
Crystal Kimberly
xoxo

"

"It's hard to have a good tommorow if you're always thinking about yesterday."- C. Roth

Happiness

Happiness: A state of mind or feeling such as contentment, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy.

But is it that simple? Is happiness in ones life really just a state of contentment, of satisfaction, pleasure, and joy? To be perfectly honest I do not agree with the simplicity of the definition in the dictionary. I think as words come into our lives, as new words are discovered, and as each individual in this world experiences new adventures, each person develops their own meaning for those words.
Happiness to me? Well the first things that pop into my mind when that word is brought up are; Family, friends, music, writing, spontaneous adventures, volunteering, sun, city lights, support, calla lilies, financial stability, living life in the moment, laughter all around me, dance parties and singing loudly, making a difference in someones life, keeping busy, health, no worries, and most importantly love. There are more things, actually the list could continue to go on for miles. Everyone has things that all add up to equal happiness in their lives. Each person is different. Each individual is unique. Each individual is precious in their own way. Some are happy with buying fancy things or spoiling their children (in a good way), and some are purely happy with being able to put a meal on the table for their family and just seeing a smile of their child's face.
Here is my logic. Whatever makes you happy, whether it is singing your heart out, writing your thoughts to the world, spending time with friends and family, et cetera, do it. You only get one life to live and why bother waste it worrying about every little thing going on. If you have to choose between taking the safe route and being happy, to be completely honest if you are going to be miserable every single time you take the safe route, take a chance and do what is going to bring that smile across your face, in your heart, and in your soul. Evidently when you make yourself happy you tend to exhuberate that happiness on to others. And those then exhuberate it so on so forth. Life is a gift we were given from God (or from whom or whatever you believe in) . Take it for what it is and take risks, jump fences, and do what you want and not what others want for you. Those whom care about you will accept you for you and for what makes you happy and ultimately they will be happy for you too. People grow. People change. And that is okay. Actually it is great! I love who I am, and I am proud of who I am and I am proud of how I was brought up to be, because it made me a good person. I know the meaning of a good life, the meaning of love and whats right or wrong. I feel noone should ever be ashamed of who they are or where they came from, because that ultimately has made you who you are today.
When I close my eyes and ponder happiness, ponder my getaway; all I can think of is family gatherings, friends all around, music blaring, the potential for a stage to be more than a fantasy, big city life, yet a calm beach atmosphere, a life of laughter, and no sadness. A life of helping others and ultimately making a difference in the world.
What is your getaway? What is your happiness? Think about it...And then do it!

xoxo
Perfectly Imperfect
Crystal Kimberly

Be part of History

How it ends:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUbc7pkj07w

Who are we?

When you look in the mirror, who do you see? Have you ever wondered what people see when they look at you? Do you ever just sit and think, who am I? And what do I want to do ? I mean, call me crazy but I do it all the time. Thinking can probably be seen as a problem of mine, ha ha. I tend to do it all too much. Of course, thinking is essential in life, however; is there such a thing as TOO much thinking. I was asked last night how I can write so much. How do I not run out of things to write about? I mean I write every single day. I guess I just have a lot inside, a lot that I want to share, and a lot that I have gone through. I guess my life is like a book, and we are in the beginning chapters. For only being twenty-one I have experienced a lot, met many people, and lived a great life. But to be honest It has not been nearly even close to what I want to do, see, and venture into. I am sitting outside on my front porch a cool, breezy, June day in my home town. Now this town is nothing like you may think. It is small, and when I say small I mean it. Ha ha. We have our own mini movie theatre, where the movies I might add, are less than 5 dollars. We have a high school, a middle school, and three elementary schools. A police/fire station, a Walmart (of course), and a park. Amongst other little places this town is preoccupied with familiar faces you tend to see on a daily basis. Growing up as a small town girl, as it may seem easy, it sometimes poses some hardships. There is UN-needed and UN-wanted drama, everyone knows everything about everyone, and you have to make your own fun. (For instance; things like car surfing.)
Now, let me tell you I am not one for drama. I actually hate it and try to avoid it at all expenses. However; as I said living in a small town there is always drama. People enjoy starting drama to keep life interesting, when in reality I find it obnoxious and a waste of time and life in general. Life is a gift we are all given and we should live it with joy and love. Forget the petty stuff. Forget the lame rumors, and forget the obnoxious things being said. The only thing that matters is what you think of yourself. You can't let others control how you feel, what you do, and who you will become. That is where coming from a small town comes in handy. The people I have met here have made me such a better person. Whether I was in love with them, or they were my closest friends. I have grown from each and every experience and I have this small town to thank for that. Yes, there is your occasional drama starting punk (lol-didn't know how to phrase that), but the people here are for the most part real. As opposed to those in other big cities only looking out for themselves, small town friends are ones who are going to not only push through lives for themselves, but they are going to be doing it while holding your hand and bringing you along. I can't help but think who I would have become if I grew up in a place like L.A. or N.Y.C? As much as I would like to convince myself that I would turn out to be the same person, there is always that curiosity. I mean lets be honest. The people that grown up in L.A., in Hollywood, etc have a completely different lifestyle than those from small towns. But anyway...
So who are we? All I can say is when you look in the mirror, I hope you are smiling, because life is nothing short of a great time full of love all around us. Who am I? I am a newly turned twenty-one year old with a big heart and with huge hopes and dreams for myself, but more importantly for my friends and family. I am one who sees so much potential in those around me, that all I want to do is help in anyway for them to reveal that potential inside, and to get them to stop hiding behind their shadows. For instance; Cory Jackson. He is basically my little brother. I love him so much. He is one of the most amazing guitarists I have been able to witness. Not only is he Ahh-mazing at guitar, in a band called Stuck on Stupid (check em out;]), but he is the sweetest, most caring and driven kid I have ever come into contact with. He would give you the shirt off his back if you lacked one. Moreover; he is the kind of person that gives you a hug when he knows something is wrong and no one else does. Ultimately If you were to look up the word inspiration in the dictionary his picture would be there. I know this sounds crazy, but I am being as true as the sky is blue. He is all these amazing things and inspires me in more ways than one. I can never NOT smile when around him, I can never be upset when he is around. He just exuberates this presence I can't even begin to explain. But as we know noone is perfect, and Cory's only imperfection is his lack of belief in his potential as much as I and others believe in him. He could be on stage with anyone he wanted to be on stage with, and he has so much inside, but he is hesitant to branch out and attack it. I mean ofcourse he has confidence, as he should. However; there is so much more he could do, but doesn't believe he could. That is what these small town friends are for. They are there to help you get off your butt and believe in yourself as much as they do. They are there to make you smile when you feel like you have forgotten what a smile is. They are there when life seems too tough to get out of bed. They are there to turn your rainy day into a sunny one. As corny as this all sounds, it is really true.
The point of this blog is to basically say: never forget where you come from. My hometown is a small one, but it has a big heart<3 . Yes every place has its faults, but it will always be home. I am not going to lie, I do want to venture on to new places, but when I do that I will never forget where I grew up, who my true friends are and the love I have received from this small town I call home.

I am a Tartan, and I am proud of it. lol


Perfectly Imperfect
xoxo
Crystal Kimberly

Whisper in my ear, love.

I just recently turned twenty one - as in three days ago- and everyone asks me if I feel different? Well the answer is no. I feel the same. The same as I did that three days ago. But I have realized I do feel like a different person. I have changed over this past year, and I am happy with that change. I have experienced things I never thought I would, I have talked about things I never thought I would, and I have the most amazing friends-most from my high school years. Don't get me wrong i love the people and friends i have met since my entrance into college, but the friends in which I met in high school have a special place in my <3heart. Those relationships weren't forced, and they have had years and years to develop. I know whenever I come home I will come home to the most amazing faces, hearts, and souls. I know these are the people who were there for me, and will always be there for me. These are the people who don't whisper behind my back, these are the people who truly love me for who i am and who I want to become. These are the people who will never doubt me, and these are the people who have forever embedded themselves in my heart. To some they lose contact with these people and its unfortunate. But me, I will forever hold onto the relationships I developed in my early years, it is imperative. But anyway, the reason for this blog update is solely to restate all I am grateful for. I am grateful for my amazing family, my amazing friends, and my amazing life. Sometimes we run into hard times and we forget all we have to actually be thankful for. Well I am thankful for every sunrise and sunset, I am thankful for every heartbreak and heal. I am thankful for every beat of nature and every look in every eye. I am thankful for music and I am thankful for my voice. I am thankful that I have freedom of speech, and I am thankful that I am not afraid to voice it. I am thankful for my life. I am thankful for your life. And I am thankful for what you are thankful. This world lacks the amount of love we really should have. Love is a precious gift we don't express enough. There is so much love to give yet people don't give it. There is so much love available to exuberate, yet people hide it. Love is an amazing thing and we should treasure it. WE should tell the ones we love we love them on a daily basis. We should be kind to all, not worry about drama, not worry about bad things rather rejoice in the good. Look into the eyes of those passing and smile. Open a door for someone. Little acts of kindness could change someones life. And if you do not believe this then you should learn it. People find the smallest acts of kindness credible. They find these acts better than fake proposals of kindness. Love those who deserve to be loved, and forgive those who have loved in the past. Everyone has a past, but everyone also has a future. There is room for forgiveness. There is room for hope. And There is definitely room for love. Break down walls people cave themselves behind, open your hearts, and sing kindness. It will change our world. I promise. (and I keep my promises)

i love you.

Perfectly Imperfect
xoxo
Crystal Kimberly

What came from me writing what I was thinking.

Sometimes our hearts hurt more than we reveal. Sometimes our smiles lack the feelings in which we conceal. Sometimes what we hide is who we are. And sometimes where we are suppose to be is not very far. But who we are is what we show. Because to the world that is what we bestow. It's like rainy day. In the month of May. Unwanted, but expected. Vulnerable, but protected. We walk on the edge, in hopes of not falling. But if we do, we know it's our calling. As laughter sweeps the lives of many. Tears embody the hearts of plenty. Fill our lives with hopes and joys. Dreaming of maintaining ones poise. We strive to be who we want to be. But it's affected by that of which people see. Truth unfolds in the lies of some. While lies unfold from what some become. Whatever life brings. The heart should be what always sings. No more echoes from those around you. Time to learn from all you've been through. A love once loved. Or a hurt you forever have shoved. A lesson comes with each mistake. And a lesson comes with each accomplishment. Always be real, and never fake. And never hide behind a wall of cement. Those who hide. Are unable to confide. Those who hide. Are hurting inside. Breathe in each moment, and in each moment take a breath. If you must, let the tears fall. If you must, punch down each and every wall. Life is a path, in which each must take. Which ones you choose, is a choice you must make.

Part of That World.

So as I sit here on Monday night, technically Tuesday morning, all I can think about is the future. What is it that it has in it's hands for me. What presents does it have for me to unwrap, and ultimately what dreams will it make available for me to live. I am at a point in my life where I am very happy with myself. I love my family, my friends, and all those surrounding me. However; I am ready to start doing things for me. I have always been the person to put everyone before myself, and I will continue to do so. But I have to start living MY life. I need to stop worrying about if I am making everyone else proud, and I need to ultimately make myself proud. There is so much I want to do in life. More than I could ever put into words. Are all those things realistic? Possibly yes, possibly no. Yet there is a life in my heart that is calling my name and has been calling my name for years. I am ready to take it off the back burner. I am ready to venture into what will make me happy. I am ready to rise to the challenges, get my feet wet, and jump out of my comfort zone. Those who know me know I am a very determined and driven individual. Once my mind is set on something I will work undoubtedly harder that I have ever before to attain that goal.
Today I sat down with a good friend. A friend who has been there for me through a lot. We discussed how much has happened in both of our lives in just the last couple of months. And it may not be significant to some people, but It has been to us. We have met some amazing people, done some incredible things, and dreamt countless nights of what could possibly come from our goals in life. Not many people my age KNOW what they want out of life. Not many people know what they want to do for the rest of their life. I do. I know the exact moments that will send chills up my spine to leave me utterly speechless. I know that when I close my eyes and see my dreams in my mind, i know that it won't be a dream much longer. However; it will become a reality. I have always been pushed to reach beyond the ceiling. I've been taught that I have no limit as a person. As my life has progressed, the ages rolling on by, I have learned so much. I have grown into the person I am today. Soon, as in eleven days, I will be turning 21. Yes the big TWENTY - ONE. Well who would of thought that by the age of twenty-one I would have this mind-set.
I went from being in love to heartbreak to being in love again to heartbreak to once again being in love. But this time. I am not in love with a significant other. However; I am in love with my life. I am in love with my dreams and the potential of my future. When my heart was first broken, I thought it couldn't be healed. That it was in a forever state of pieces. At that point in my life I was vulnerable, I was young, I was naive, insecure, and ultimately I was in love for the first time. Then I fell again, unfortunently time was of essence and a key factor in the heartbreak to come. I have no regrets in my life. Moreover; I have lessons learned which have brought me to where I am today. After the heartbreak I thought I had to be with someone to be happy. I had been "that" girl who had consistently always been in a relationship. It was where I was most comfortable, least vulnerable, and most used to. Yet, recently I have learned that I have grown into such a strong person. And I can actually step up and admit that now. Rather than fretting on the past, we must indulge in the present and dream for the future. Lets remmember though. The past is significant in that it has helped you grow as an individual, and has inevitabley made you who you are today. But we shouldn't think about what if's and why's? We need to say to ourselves that is the past, there is nothing that can be done to change it. The present and future are what you can change. You can be who you want to be, go where you want to go, and live the way you want to live.
Me, well I am a small town girl awaiting my break into the bigger picture. Yes, this small town is good to come home too, but I know it's almost time for me to leave. My memories are here, but my future is not. I need to venture into a new world with new opportunities. I am looking forward to meeting new people, endeavoring into new adventures, and forever living the dream I write about everyday. Maybe one day I will tell you all the list of things I would like to venture into. But for now...I will leave it at this.

Always fight for what you want and never settle. Never let anyone tell you that you can not do something, and if they do use that energy to achieve your goals that much more. Prove them wrong. Do what makes YOU happy, and be true to yourself. The question I always ask my self, is what you see in the mirror who you want to be? And if it isn't do something about it. And I am not referring to looks. I am referring to what you see in your eyes, the person who lies beneath them. Who is that person, and what do THEY want? Ultimately it is your life, noone elses. It is your playground, so play:) Go to distance, dream big, and question the world to get answers. It is like Ariel in the Little Mermaid said, "Ready to know what the people know, Ask 'em my questions and get some answers. What's a fire and why does it - what's the word? Burn? When's it my turn? Wouldn't I love, love to explore that world up above? Out of the sea. Wish I could be Part of that world."

Much love,

Perfectly Imperfect
xoxo
Crystal Kimberly